Is age an issue in relationships?

[Englishuser]

Hi,

In most countries, people who have reached their majority can marry each other freely, meaning that a 25-year-old can legally marry a 55-year-old, for instance. Do you think age can be an issue in such relationships, or would it rather be something that could strengthen the bond between the two? What do you think?

All the best

EU

[NinaZara]

Hello,

I think age will most definitely be an issue in such relationships.Not however, between the two.

The age difference could be something that could strengthen the bond between the two. But I also think that the age difference is the extra thing that the two have that other couples do not have.

For example, an older man is likely to be more experienced and has more patience than a younger man. Not to mention a substantial difference in maturity and stability that he can offer.

I, for one prefer an older man for a husband. To some, this kind of age difference struck them as indecent, but I say, when a person is attracted to another one, why fight it?

Maturity sure is fascinating,
Nina

[Jamie (K)]

In most parts of my country people think a spousal age difference of more than about 10 years is strange, and when it gets to 20 years, they'll think it's obscene. This can cause great trouble for people who, for one reason or another, did not marry in their 20s or early 30s, because as a generation gets older, more and more or the people available for marriage are unsuitable for it (either they're crazy, angry from a divorce, or there is something else wrong with them). I tend to socialize with women quite a bit younger than I am, and sometimes we get dirty looks or remarks. People assume I abandoned an older wife and a brood of children to run away with a new "trophy", but it's not true.

Personally, I don't think marriage between spouses of differing ages is any stranger or more difficult than marriage between people from two different nations or cultures, and sometimes it's easier.

One of the drawbacks I've found is the difference in experience and understanding of the world. The younger woman might be about to do something that the older man knows from experience is a mistake. It's like he's watching an old TV show for the seventh time, but to her it's all new. Due to lack of experience, the woman might not believe him when he says it's a mistake, and it's not good for a relationship when one partner is always bossing the other around and saying not to try things. So at certain times, the older partner has to hang back and let the younger partner make an error, and then help solve the resulting problem. Of course, if it's going to be a really catastrophic mistake, the older partner has to say something.

Once a friend of mine -- who herself was abandoned by her father -- told me that girls whose fathers have left them miss the influence of an older man, and that if they don't get it in childhood, they're liable to try to get it by finding an older husband. She should know from her own experience, and she didn't find anything wrong with women doing that.

[*Delta*]

i think that if there's love and understanding between those two people the age won't be a problem at all