TOEFL® essay: Some people belive that students should be given one long vacation

[Irinafomina]

hello. im preparing for the TOEFL. Can somebody check my writing and leave some commen on the essay please

Some people belive that students should be given one long vacation each year. Others belive that students should have several short vacations throughtout the year. Which viewpoint do you agree with. Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.

Nowadays education plays a big role in a humons life. The better knowledge base you have the better you you will be able to find. Therefore, it is very iportant to have effective education system in order to make the learning process interesting and wishful for students. That’s why, in my opinion, students should be given several short vacations throughtout the year. Ill give you some few reasons that streagthen my point of view.
Who are the students? Usually, the are young blood who just started to experiment the real life full of happiness and drama. Everybody remember themselves at that age, im sure.
Where do people get knowledge? At school/college/university which provides students a huge amount of information that can be seemed impossible for understanding for someone, by the by, and in hence, make students overstres. I remember myself at school when I had problems with mathmatics and geometry. I got bored of learnig process and felt upset. I studied all day long after school, spent a lot of time doing homework and additional exercises but still couldn’t get a clue deeply. Then I decided to have a rest for oe week and go to visit my grandmother to the village. So when I came back everything seem very easy to me. My brain was fresh and clear. This is my experience that shows how is it useful to get a rest for couple of days, especially when you are overstressed.
Also, many people attend well-known college or university from other cities or even countries in order to get better education, new experience, career preporation. In this case, a short vacation is a chance to go back to their mothertown to met with relatives and friends. Only students whose home and place where the study are not in the same city will understandhow is it important to see parents, to get some advice, warm, tenderness, and moneyed assistance as well.
Moreover,a short repose can be a good time for self-developing, spacially : to analyse mistakes, problems were made before; to summarize the information was gotten from shool/college/ university; to read the books were recommened by academic.
From all above, I strongly belive that several short vacations throughtout the year can bring a tolerable results as a rising students activity after spending a good time with their family, friends, doing some self-developing work. Now, with a new positive energy, is the time to learn more about the world!

[Sipa2008]

What is the difference between liberty and latitude and in what context they can be used??????. Thanks.