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#2 (permalink) Sat Apr 11, 2009 17:17 pm Please give some feedback on my story! |
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Amit, I think you are a great student of English. If you have any problems with your story at all, it is that you are using " I " too often. Try to get your sentences to merge with each other, whilst maintaining the flow of the story.
However, it was VERY good.
Kitosdad. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hello everyone, my name is Amit. I am a handicapped person, so I don't often go far from my home.
My English is not very good, as I don't often get the opportunity to speak to many people in English, but I do like to strike up friendships .Mostly I like people with nice friendly personalities. Listening to good music and watching movies are my favourite pastimes..
Writing poses the greatest problem for me, but I really do try my best.
There is a saying “ if you try, you may succeed”. So, I am trying my very best.
My mother has two children. Myself being the youngest, while the oldest is forty-one years old.
My father is a retired officer, on whom I am dependent for my living.
In my childhood, I was badly affected by polio. The disease has destroyed my whole body. I walk now with the help of callipers and a stick.
Earlier in my life I was admitted to an English medium school, but I was not a good student.
I don't seem to be able to remember my studies. My memory seems very weak. I don't know why! _________________ Englishman living in Germany. |
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Kitosdad I'm a Communicator ;-)

Joined: 04 Mar 2009 Posts: 3766 Location: ESSEN, Germany, (but English.)
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#3 (permalink) Sun Jul 05, 2009 11:48 am Story: I am a handicapped and unemployed person. I can't go far outside my house. |
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| Hi Amit.In my oppionion you are good at using english.And you are right if you try,you will be successful.Good luck:-) |
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Nejla New Member
Joined: 08 May 2009 Posts: 5
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#4 (permalink) Mon Jul 06, 2009 1:12 am Story: I am a handicapped and unemployed person. I can't go far outside my house. |
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Hello dear friend, this is Joao Fonseca from Brazil, your story is nice, I have heard and seen lots of people and I do have some friend with the same living as you do. I guess I can undestand. whoever is out of the situation as you are sounds more confortable, but for me it is like no respect. so I am not going to ask about the way you live, you already wrote that. but I will write to you as a human been like I do to others. try to keep in good faith. If you want to pracice your english writing in me you hav someone to write about. so let´s keep in touch. I live in Brasilia the capital of Brazil, and where are you from? write a bit abou you. _________________ Joao Mª H. Fonseca
Your last mistake is your best teacher. |
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Joao Fonseca I'm here quite often ;-)

Joined: 31 Jul 2008 Posts: 193 Location: Brasília DF., Brazil
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| Kit Daemon. THE END. | Do you want to improve your English? |